Tag: happiness

Flying

Flying

The first flight I recall going on was Christchurch to Auckland, visiting Grandma with Mum when I was about 4. I’m not sure why I got to go but I did, and it wasn’t the only time I flew to Auckland just with Mum. I remember there being a Viscount aeroplane and based on Wikipedia it must have been a Vickers Viscount 807, with 32 seats, although it felt quite large to me! Later it was the Boeing 737 on that route and then the Airbus A320 and occasionally A321. Grandma had a clock that I’ve recently had restored and written about again (I am sure my psychotherapist will have a field day with all of this). Anyway, back to flying.

I went for a period of anxiety with flying and really didn’t enjoy it at all, but out the other side some years ago it’s that easy flow feeling at the airport, on the plane and all bits in-between. Just don’t be late and don’t stress on delays or other first world inconveniences.

A Vickers Viscount 807 in Wellington 1971 – photo courtesy of Wikipedia

We’re very fortunate in this country with air services from one end to the other and for me nothing more that two hours flying for where I need to be. Of course, there’s more time involved – don’t be late for security because odds are it will be busy, be prepared for a delay every few flights – we live in a country of wild weather and anything can happen. But I try and be prepared – chargers, headphones, and the absolute least luggage possible. Ideally, only a carry on smallest type of bag if at all possible. And last but not least – I’m writing this to convince myself – leave the food and drinks. It’s awful how much you can consume between meals during the flying routine. If I feel I need to eat then I try and follow the nutrition advice to try and eat up to 30 different plant types a week – hard to do that with stew, rice and sandwiches on tap at the lounge, but easy with salad and fruit. I try anyway!

If you have something you want to do, that gives you a level of contentment – like for me writing a blog on here, but don’t have time, headspace or the energy after a long day – the flying journey can be ideal. If I eat and tinker with my phone it’s ok, just, but doing something meaningful in amongst the haze of the flying ritual is enormously beneficial. Looking around the airport lounge in Christchurch right now, the majority of people are on phones or screens (like me!), but some are reading books, catching up with calls to friends. Bringing meaning to a moment on the move.

Waiting to board the A320 at Auckland Domestic

I recently watched the new David Attenborough-narrated TV series Our Planet II. It’s got the usual lion hunting wildebeest (who knew it wasn’t spelt “beast?”), but the main theme is about movement. Sharks who swim thousands of kilometres to feed on Albatros chicks who crash land on their first flight. The Albatros that do make it don’t come back to land for five years. And Wildebeest that form the largest herd in the world and move thousands of kilometres through Africa in a constant search for food and water. Closer to home not far from my Auckland house there’s the Muriwai Gannet colony where chicks are hatched before migrating 2000 kilometres to Australia returning two to six years later to lay their eggs.

My flying seems more mundane and somewhat less existential than for the animals in the wild. But humans have always embraced movement, which I find a little addictive, and somehow energy and purpose giving if I follow my own guidance on the routines.

Stephen

It’s in your head

It’s in your head

I’ve been grappling a bit over the last couple of years with resilience – the concepts more than the actual thing (I think!). People talk of building it up, focussing on your wellbeing to make sure you are resilient, especially during this Covid era when uncertainty about work, health, travel, whanau is ever present. It’ll be coming up four years soon since I saw my eldest son, now settled in Ireland with children of his own, one I’ve not seen in person. There are thousands of similar, and far more challenging situations for many Kiwis. I’m thinking especially those who have lost their employment or had their earnings restricted from business, or who haven’t been able to say farewell to loved ones who have died. It’s tough. And resilience is needed.

I was out at my little piece of paradise this long Waitangi weekend, doing some cleaning up, after a big clean up – moving bits of old metal, some electric power line fittings – trees in pots that had fallen over and so on. I’ve been very cautious – one of my legs is not what it used to be and I’ve been looking after my resilience by protecting it, having others to do the hard graft, leaving me for such strenuous activities as watering and fetching cold drinks from the fridge in the container (should you leave it on? – I hope it’s alright!).

Something switched – maybe I suddenly reached a tipping point and got tougher, but I grabbed all the old metal, electrical fittings and some bits of timber and lugged them up the hill to the bin. Cripes it felt good. Then I did it again. Then I moved the plants back upright. Then I attacked the door to the bore shed that’s been jamming – fixed that.

I’m certain it wasn’t all in my head, I have been weaker, but it had got in my head and now it’s out and I’m free and strong to do what I can. Well that’s what it feels like – probably won’t make the Olympic team quite yet, but you get the drift!

Mount Taranaki

In The Mental Toughness Handbook by Damon Zahariades he separates resilience from mental toughness. He says Resilience:

“is the ability to bounce back from unforeseen complications. It’s the ability to adapt. For example, suppose you leave your home at a normal time en route to your workplace. Unfortunately, you run into expectedly heavy traffic on the freeway. This setback is sure to make you late for a meeting scheduled that morning.
A resilient person might grit his teeth and curse under his breath, but he’d ultimately adapt to this circumstance. He might seek a different route to his workplace, using his phone’s GPS feature. Or he may call his office and reschedule the meeting. Or he might compose an explanation for his tardiness that allows him to avoid others’ disapproval.

Mental toughness is a mindset. It not only reflects our ability to bounce back from unforeseen complications, but also demonstrates a positive outlook during the experience. It’s not just the ability to handle stressful situations. It reflects how we handle them. For example, a mentally tough person caught in unexpectedly heavy traffic might take the opportunity to listen to an inspiring audiobook. In fact, she might be pleased with her circumstance because it gives her the opportunity.”

Obviously there’s more to it in the book than I can relay here, but think about the times when things go wrong – do you see it as an opportunity? Or do you try and make sure the tracks are covered?

I’m not advocating pulling yourself up by the bootstrings necessarily but there is something to be said for thinking of the opportunity. But it’s tough. Mentally tough, but it might just be in your head as to which way you choose.

Resilience vs Mental Toughness. Subtly different.

Stephen

True music for a lockdown

True music for a lockdown

We’re into week ten and pandemic news, stories and feelings keep rolling on. There’s history now – I find myself saying remember what we did in the first lockdown, and television programmes with references – do you remember during the lockdown when we…… (from The Pact of Silence filmed in Wales during Lockdown). The roads are busier now, much busier than the first level 3 which felt tentative – are we allowed to do this? – replaced by traffic jams at Kumeu where surfers heading to Muriwai mix it with locals, tradies and families meeting for picnics (well that’s what to say if asked!).

Winter starts slowly, teasing, is it the one we know, you know the old bank advert? – just like the start of this lockdown – there’s been one case, could it grow, more news, a press conference – the orchestra winds up and Vroom!, it’s here, full lockdown and Vivaldi’s Violin Concerto in F Minor Winter from the Four Seasons is away. It feels just right as my go-to classical music this lockdown, even though Winter moved to Spring and it’ll be Summer before we’re out. Somewhere in Spotify, you can find out how many times you’ve listened to a track, but it’s got to be dozens, several times every day sometimes. A quiet moment before a video call, some actual work to be done and it’s on again.

A challenger arrived soon after lockdown – maybe before we were at level 3 – True – Spandau Ballet’s biggest hit, from the album of the same name in 1983. Released a month before I moved to Auckland and where I’ve been ever since. You know when sometimes you just can’t stop listening to a track – this is it for me – I’m addicted. Spotify says it’s had nearly 300 million listens – I feel like I’m a million of them.

But I’d like to leave Auckland – well not for good – but sometime soon to go to Queenstown, and to Christchurch to see Mum and Dad. Auckland’s doing it’s bit with over 90% of first vaccinations and we’re hopeful that we’ll get to 90% double jabbed by Christmas. Then we’re on the Traffic Lights, but they’re on red at the border until everyone else is 90% too. Come on Reefton! Step up, I want to see the folks! Even if you think we deserve to be stranded here for being Jafas, this is something we’re doing for all of us and it’s really easy and can only do good.

I’m still walking – every day without fail – sometimes twice, and we ran a 10,000 a day challenge at PwC recently which was a great team booster. Some of my team did their steps during meetings, and I still find myself checking the daily tally to see how I’m going.

I figure I might as well enjoy lockdown – that’s not to say it’s easy for many people – but I’m not staying miserable for months at a time. I figure that I can do my bit, encourage others to get vaccinated, walk, work (yep, I’m fortunate, very), music, and dream of a time when we’re out of Lockdown and reminiscing about all the good things we did during Lockdown. Like learning about living in the moment and the lack of pressure to go anywhere. Some days I quite like it.

True.

Stephen

For trustworthy information on New Zealand’s Covid-19 Vaccination check out the Ministry of Health site.

201

201

I appear to have picked up some more followers, or at least followers who have noticed, because I’ve blogged about walking and related adventures, such as Cornwall Park.

The most common subject I hear in the leadership world right now is about well-being. It’s a broad subject and seems to cover physical and mental health when it is referred.

We all know it’s important to be in good health, so why the increased consciousness about well-being now?

I did my 201st walk last week for 2019. I probably won’t make 400, but they’re longer now, so maybe 365 is a good goal!

iStock-950716438.jpgWell-being is really about satisfaction, happiness or contentment. You chose the word that suits.

I’m not particularly satisfied that I’ve completed 201 walks, but I am increasingly happy and content from the energy, space and health that those 201 walks have provided me with.

And you can do it almost anywhere.

Stephen