How do you appear?

A lot of commentary I read about so-called leadership makes reference to leaders appearing genuine, or coming across as sincere or expressing sorrow.

Well, yeah that’s good on a Sunday read waiting for the takeaway Latte but am I the only one that sees this for what it is?  If you’re being being coached to appear sincere or to look like you’re interested stop and ask yourself wtf?

If you ever hear me say “I apologise” call me on it. If I apologise, then I will say “I’m sorry”. I digress for a moment, but when a public official apologises but doesn’t say sorry, it’s not as inauthentic as you might think. Actually it’s authentic, but they’re probably not sorry. If you’re sorry, you say it, you don’t describe your state.

So in coaching leaders by suggesting that they appear remorseful when things go wrong, or genuine when dealing with customers, without putting too fine a point on it, crap.

That’s superficial, pretend rubbish.

You either are remorseful, or genuine (which might be not sorry!) or you’re not.

You will appear as you are. That’s called authentic leadership.

One thought on “How do you appear?

  1. Agreed! If only we could all regularly view video of ourselves, we would realise just what we are communicating! How many leaders get an opportunity to see themselves as others see them? Yet this is such a powerful lesson. Similar to when sales people say: “I can’t stand this one customer, but of course I would never let them know that.” Yeah right! I do take what opportunities I can to say to managers and sales people that their thoughts leak to all around them, so if they think it, it is as if they have said it. Tough but true. You have to BE what you say. Enjoyed the insights -thanks! Cherri

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