Tag: authentic leadership

Is that my hot water?

I’ve worked very late the last few days getting ready for a new programme we’re running next week. Working late when under pressure can test my resilience and with it, my sense of humour but I’ve kept it intact so far. Well that’s my own reflection anyhow and I’m the one doing the writing here!

I spent yesterday in Mt Maunganui with clients workshopping (is that really a word?) some concepts that will be used to roll out some performance management and training over the coming year. It was a pleasure to work with people who know how to have a laugh. We cracked jokes and had several Larry David moments including “was that hot water for my long black or are we sharing? I feel I need to claim it if it’s just mine you know”.

I reckon we achieved a lot yesterday. We worked pretty hard and the ability to have a laugh during the process was an important component of how we worked. We didn’t put a team charter together, we all took roles at leading and at times there were random jokes that on the face of it distracted, but actually kept the energy up, the connections alive and the thought processes going.

Do you know anyone who doesn’t enjoy a joke? Is there a relationship between humour and creativity? Humour and irony in particular is an important part of our culture and can have an important role in leadership.

Do you use humour in your leadership? Do you try to? Or does it just happen? Giving feedback truthfully and with empathy will require emotional intelligence, experience and a lot of self-awareness. Delivering difficult news about a restructure proposal will be a serious business. And you won’t want to make light of it.

Lot’s of leadership though, is about creating an energy that gets your team in a creative space, if you’re wanting to take your business to the next level. Taking that step-change you know you need to create to make a difference.

That’s where humour can come in. Not taking the mickey out of each other – that can easily be bullying – but sharing humour with each other. Irony that acts like a team brain gym, keeping the energy up and the creative juices flowing.

Think of it another way: does the permanently serious boss who frowns when you’re having a laugh really get the team going? Chances are it’s about something else – some fear of not being in the group which he or she won’t be if there’s no engagement. No casual Friday around this dude!

So are you a leader with humour? I’d say you can’t be one without the other. Humour is that special, connecting characteristic of being a human being that not only separates us from the animals – it can separate us from the mundane.

Back off, the hot water is mine! It’s actually quite a serious business. Maybe humour is actually the opposite of what we think it is. Seriously, you need it. Especially if you want to engage.

Stephen

Same change

Season 1 Disc 1. By the time you read this (if I’m that lucky!) I will have had my breakfast with the IAP2 group. The topic is authentic leadership and I know that most of the people who are coming along have had to deal with a lot of change over the last year or so. I sometimes use a photograph of a major motorway under construction and for a bit of fun, get the people present to see if they can identify it. Then later, I show a photograph of another motorway under construction. It’s odd, because it looks familiar but not quite right. Actually it’s the same motorway, first construction 45 years ago and then the reconstruction, right now.

my-pohutukawa-becoming-variegated-or-maybe-becoming-not-variegated.jpg
My Pohutukawa going through change – either becoming variegated or not variegated. Time will tell.

I’m revisiting the first few episodes of Seinfeld in preparation for the presentation in the morning (good thing they won’t read this first!). The most successful television series of all time and watching the first disc after quite a few years it certainly appears to be the show about nothing. Or is it?  They look a little younger, the set is dated, the humour is slightly more obvious. There’s constant change to be dealt with from an endless pit of shallow human interaction you might think, somewhat cynically. They are stories though.

I’ve a feeling that in the morning we’ll have some stories about change – some that hurt, some that’s exciting and some grudgingly accepted. We can learn a lot from the change that we’ve had in the past. That’s not exactly new of course although we can easily overlook past experiences in dealing with the current change.

So how to tap into the change learnings from the past that might be buried? Think about where you go for your authenticity stories? What’s your Season 1 Disc 1? The more you practice your authentic stories with your teams, the more change you will uncover further and further back, that  is the same as what you’ve got going on now.

We’ll be there in the morning. Happening right now if you’re reading this first thing.

Stephen

Friday leadership

As I write I have this warm feeling of a big week, quite a lot achieved and lots of positive signs that we’re moving in the right direction. Friday is a good day for wearing jeans (along with Monday, Tuesday, Wed…I digress!), to get that moving fast but relaxed feeling. Does that make sense?  Tim ordered a new game which was delivered to work here and he’s at home waiting for it. It’s a bit rainy, so a good night for a game I reckon. Word has come in via a text that the run tomorrow starts at 6.30am. Ouch. So whether I make it or not will in part depend on whether I can’t resist a visit to Tanuki’s Cave for Japanese, and suffer the consequences of having to have a lonely long run later.

Either way, it’s still Friday and the week’s work is done – in fact the cleaners are here so I should be getting the hell outa here real soon. Darren Hughes resigned as an MP a few hours ago due to sex-crime allegations after a night in town. I know he’s young and I probably sound like an old man: don’t these MPs get it? Going on a drinking session with students is hardly going to be positive. You don’t have to be boring but in leadership roles, you’re in a goldfish bowl, everyone is watching and telling less – except in this case, someone told the cops and now it’s ugly. Ouch. Maybe that 6.30am start won’t really hurt me, compared to this fiasco for Darren Hughes.

If you see a blurry army truck pointing at you maybe it's time to head home!

If you find me on a Friday night, I hope you find me much the same as you would while I’m running your workshop. Though I’ll try not to facilitate your gathering, promise!

I hope you don’t get a surprise. That’s about being authentic.

Friday leadership can really stuff you up if it’s all made up (or you drink too much I guess – then it’s all made up anyway).

Have a great weekend. My carpets are cleaned and the office is looking sparkling for Monday.

Stephen

Muscle up for the good times

“So Dad, if I bought some dumb bells and a swiss ball I could probably do most of the weights I need to, do you think?”. “That’s right Thomas, as I’ve said many times you might be taller but it’s winning the arm wrestle that counts!”.  The race is on, I’ll just have to keep running so I’m not tested as I’m pretty sure the day will come…..

I keep thinking about story telling. When group members want stories from each other what always comes out are stories that are positive. I see that people have a desire to talk to their strengths and they take the positive experiences from what they have got from life. Not every part of every story is positive – there are tragedies and negative experiences on the way through – but (am I allowed to say But!) the building of leadership experiences is in this sort of forum based on strengths and positives.

Dad was contemplating with me today about how he could write up his childhood as two stories, both believable, both in part true.

His words of what made him today: “the love and protection of my parents, feeling secure, school days and the friends there, play time after school, making our own kites and the thrill of getting them to fly in the park, the  kindly church people who took an interest in us boys, celebrating birthdays and Christmas, picnics, visiting Sumner beach by tram, going to the annual Industries Fair, etc. etc.“. He then said he could focus on the negative things – I’m sure sadness with his father dying while he was in his teens would feature, but would in the end be a source of strength. I notice that he didn’t give me any of this negative detail, and that’s common when people are asked for their stories in a growing and empowering environment.

I don’t subscribe to those  pearly white teeth TV host type feel-good yeah yeah yeah, think positive and you WILL be bullshit. I do subscribe to strength-based reflection such as Marcus Buckingham promotes.

As leaders, bringing the best out in our teams is part and parcel of authentic leadership. And to do that authentically, how about a dosage of stories, the lessons of which are part of the strengths we bring to the table?

If negativity is setting in, having the courage to stop and say “well that’s not my experience” when it’s sounding like a downward spiral of experience that isn’t going to help anyone grow or learn is sometimes all it needs to get back on track.

I’ll be running (scared!) from now on, seeing as Thomas has my swiss ball and all those weights.

We all have our strengths and the stories will reveal them if we choose. Maybe an ultra-marathon one day.

Stephen