Category: Leadership Insights

Coaching the boss

Lots of my time with leaders is spent not on leading others who report to them, but rather dealing with the board or the group CEO or similar.

Ambiguity of expectations, lack of clarity on results, conversations that leave the leader wondering at best, confused at worst.

Yes we need to get clarity and ensure that the board or our boss make their expectations clear, as best can be for senior people.

But it’s also an opportunity to coach the boss. Working closely with someone gives you a unique opportunity to observe. Knowing when and how to give the feedback and not to, is vital of course for everyone, but especially so for your boss.

So here’s the first of my daily tips – this one adapted from Amy Gallo “How to give your boss feedback”:

  • Wait or ask permission: ask if they’re open to feedback, rather than launching.
  • Focus on helping him or her: Not what you would do, but what would be best to grow your boss.
  • If you’re not sure, don’t say it: No point in damaging the relationship if the feedback is not going to be well received. Use other methods, such as a 360 feedback process.

Stephen

Fight

I’ve just seen the movie “The Fighter”. It’s a true story about two brother boxers, one of whom once fought Sugar Ray Leonard and has been a crack addict ever since. I found the family intensely irritating – seven awful sisters lead by an equally unappealing mother. One thing the director sure got right was that no-one seemed to listen. Just talking out a whole pile of rubbish when the younger brother, played by Mark Wahlberg, tried to speak. He reminded me of many, often young people, who aren’t heard and give up trying to be, as those with supposedly superior wisdom and insights are the only ones heard.

What if – the mother in this case – was really full of garbage? Using her power and position to extrovert above all others, pushing everything her way, without regard to what could or couldn’t work.

Without even trying to understand.

Being understood is worth fighting for. But it’s not something you can always fight for. It can be incredibly tiring. If you’re in a team, or a family, or even a group of friends (great practice place) notice: do others hear you? do you hear others? do you take the time to enquire? or is your stuff always more important? why do you need to get your stuff out all the time?

Leadership is about hearing others, ensuring all the team is heard and they hear each other. Like properly. Not pretending to do it while you have your bit poised on the end of your tongue.

If you’re present, mindful and pro-active, you’ll know what I mean. Pro-active: my new world. I meant to write word and it came out as world and I realised it was perfect.

A pro-active world of mindful and present people. I’ll fight for that.

Stephen

Speechless

Can the leader be less than perfect? Yes you say, but what if they have a major impediment, like a stammer. King George VI did as you’ll see (if you didn’t know already) if you see the movie The King’s Speech. Sometimes you can’t “get another job” as suggested by his speech therapist before he knew what his job actually was.

It was a thoroughly enjoyable movie and it made me think. When you look through the leadership development businesses and blogs the author is typically portrayed as healthy, positive and portraying all the characteristics one might expect of a leader.  Expect?  What if the first thing that was brought to your attention was a stammer, say?

Could that work?  We talk about tolerance, diversity, empathy in leadership.

So could you lead up and be lead by someone you needed to help in a significant way? Maybe you do.

Are we truly tolerant of diversity? If leaders think they’re showing courage and vulnerability try being speechless with a stammer.  That’s a leader to follow.  If they can lead with that, what else could they do?

Stephen

A blog a day for leadership?

I’m officially back at work this week and feeling very pleased with a number of things: a great break, some good runs, family time, read some books and refreshed this blog. So how about I blog more frequently  to keep it real fresh I’ve been thinking? Then I discovered that there was a challenge to do this on the provider that hosts this site – to blog once a day or once a week.

There’s a risk of course: quantity rather than quality. I think that no matter how I try, blogging every day is likely to turn into a chore that needs to be done, rather than adding value. But blogging once a week is about what I do now. So how about I go somewhere inbetween? Say 3 times a week for a total of 150 times this year.  If I can get something out of the blogging, who knows you might too. You might even like to suggest ideas for a blog. What are some thoughts and views about some current issues? I’ll probably be able to have an opinion and if not I might be able to pose some questions. I’ll blog as I have in the past about my own leadership experiences, insights from the Courses I run at the Centre for Innovative Leadership and other stuff, sometimes just for fun.

It has often seemed that everyday there is some moment that I’ve especially enjoyed or learned from. So now I’ll need to see whether my moments are worth my frequent ramblings!

Subscribe to this site on the top right and you’ll received an email with a direct link to the lastest blog when it’s posted. I promise you won’t be reading for long and if you get anything out of it feel free to leave a comment. As a bride to win friends I’ll give a book on leadership to one lucky subscriber from the first 50 on 1 March 2011.

So what’s this blog got to do with leadership? Well everything really – it’s my way of saying, you live, lead and grow each and every day. Not just when you’re in the mood.

Stephen